So what's new??

Not a whole lot really. Weather is still doing it's thing - cold one day, mild the next. Had another storm pass right by us over the weekend and while other areas of the Maritimes got slammed with snow, we had heavy heavy rain. Not complaining. No shoveling that shit lol :)

In other news - back in December our new recreation/ice rink opened - Queen's Place Emera Centre  - it really is an amazing place - most people walk in, take a look around and promptly exclaim "it's like we're not even in Liverpool anymore!"  It's true really.  The new ice surface is NHL regulation. You can sit and watch a hockey game and NOT freeze your butt off because the place is heated :D  Great new fitness center. And a walking track.  Now.  When I first heard there was going to be an inside walking track I laughed..."why would anyone want to PAY to walk inside". 

Yea, not saying that anymore LOL A little over a week ago my friend Susan dragged me over to walk with her one day.  And I've been hooked ever since :)  Instead of paying $2 per walk, I paid the $20 for the month. I go twice a day, morning and evening.  I do usually 22-24 laps each walk which takes me approx 35-40 mins.  22 laps equals about 5 kms.  So I'm getting darn close to 10 kms in a day. Go me!!  I usually take Megs with me in the evening. We each pop in our Ipods, crank our tunes, zone out and boogey. It's awesome.  I'm hoping by the end of summer to be able to pay for a full years gym membership.  Please don't ask me what got into me. lol  No, actually it was more of a bit of a scare with my diabetes and blood sugar numbers, and finally deciding to do something about my health.  I've pretty much given up my Tim Horton's coffee addiction. (used to get 4-5 larges a day! - now I might get ONE every 2-3 days!) Still smoking, but not as much. One addiction at a time please :)  So far I think I'm doing pretty darn good if I do say so myself :)

So that's things in a nut shell. :)

Its been an odd Winter so far...

one day it's freezing cold, you spend the day trying to get warm and stay warm. The next day? Like today?? It's sunny and mild, you've got windows opened enjoying what could almost be compared to Spring like.  Odd. We've had hardly any snow so far this Winter...and when we DO get any, it's nearly always followed by rain. And then those lovely mild temps. Everything is green still.  We've had 2 storms so far in January, both with dumping a rather big amount of the ugly white stuff on us.  And both times, upon waking the following day it's all gone.  I'm not complaining. Trust me! lol  I'm rather enjoying this weather.  Here's hoping February follows suit. :D

In Kid news....both doing well, school going great, no complaints from either of them or me. yay :) In Alyssa news...as part of her 2 year culinary program, she has to complete a 600 hour co-op, starting in April, ending before she returns to NSCC in October - we've kinda been in limbo wondering where in the heck she was going to do this, she had even been thinking about moving up to Cape Breton with her grandfather (if he was agreeable that is!) and finding somewhere up there to work....BUT....Friday night she was at work and her boss Jeromy asked her if she wanted to do her co-op there. YAY!!!  She's thrilled, I'm thrilled. Whew! AND she gets paid for the co-op, so that means 600 guaranteed paid hours.  I'm thinking - hot damn that's your tuition paid for in the Fall. She's thinking HOT DAMN...a car! LOL  Maybe we can compromise and get a nice 2nd hand car and maybe half the tuition paid?? 


And in me news?  nothing new really to report. Same ol', same ol'.  I am however in the process of joining our local Lion's club...my friend Crystal is a member and has been after me to join for a long time now...I finally caved lol.  Went to my first meeting last Monday, just need to fill out some paperwork, and yea. That will be me, Lion DonnaLeigh. :D

Depression:

  Dictionary.com's description is as follows:

noun

1. the act of depressing.

2. the state of being depressed.

3. a depressed  or sunken place or part; an area lower than the surrounding surface.

4. sadness; gloom; dejection.

5. Psychiatry . a condition of general emotional dejection and withdrawal; sadness greater and more prolonged than that warranted by any objective reason. 

 

It's symptoms can range from one extreme really to the other.  You're sad. You cry a lot. You're unhappy most of the time. Nothing you do brings you happiness or peace.  But it goes well beyond that for some people. It becomes so much a part of your life you feel as if you'll never escape it.  Most people wouldn't be able to tell if someone was depressed - not it that person hides it well.

 

I am one of those people.  Surprised?  I think many people would be. To look at me, I don't think anyone would be able to tell. But I am.  I was diagnosed with depression 11 years ago.  Four months after my mother passed away from cancer, I sat in my Doctor's office, crying uncontrollably. Crying for no reason. The tears just exploded from my eyes and would NOT stop.  My lovely Dr just smiled at me, reached for a box of kleenex, handed them to me and waited for the rush of emotions to calm down enough so that I could speak.  It took a while if I remember correctly.  I can remember the conversation as if it was yesterday.  "I do this ALL the time." "I lock myself in the bathroom for hours crying" "I hide down in the darkened basement and I just cry" "I'm not sleeping well anymore - I either want to sleep all the time, or not at all"    He looked at me with kind understanding eyes and said "I can tell you exactly what's wrong - you're suffering from depression. It's completely understandable considering all that you've gone through with your mother.  Depression comes in all shapes and sizes and for all kinds of reasons. I can help you"  

 

And he did.  He wrote me a prescription for an anti-depressant. A mild one, none addictive.  It turned out to be the best thing ever.  I called them my "Happy Pills"  I spent the next 4 years needing them. I got through my grief of losing my Mother, only to lose my husband 2 years later.  It's been a rough road, these last 11 years.

 

 Most of my close friends & family know. Most of them understand. Not all mind you, but most.  My depression has gone beyond the just feeling sad all the time.  The last year or two it has progressed to actual physical pain.  I ache all the time. My neck, my shoulders. Headaches.  It's not fun. But I cope. I have no choice but to cope.  I'm grateful for everything I have been blessed with in my life. I'm trying to make the rest better. But it's hard when most days, the most you can cope with is just getting out of bed and getting dressed. When the entire day disappears without you noticing.  When the hours of your life turn into days, then weeks, then months and you can't do anything about the time you've lost. 

That's my life.  Why did I decide to share this today? Not really sure other then it's been on my mind lately. January is a "bad" month for me.  Both my Mother and my husband Pat died in January.  So if I'm not talkative, or chatty, or in the mood to be sociable, maybe this will help you understand.